a good read

So I just reread Redeeming Love over the weekend. It's a really powerful book. I think at least. I was trying to be open to anything God might have to say to me through it, but i'm not sure if that happened or not. I don't know if the lack of hearing from Him is because he's not talking, or i'm still being disciplened, or if i just can't hear. I think i'm trying to listen. At least i'm trying to try to listen. And i'm also not really sure what message to listen to. I want to listen to the message of this book about his incredible unwavering love for us. And his unmeasurable unearnable grace. And to the story of the prodigal son, and David, and Abraham, and Peter, etc.. But then i read about his judgement in Romans from Paul and God's wrath that waits for us who know the truth and yet go on to choose our own way, and it's just so hard to reconcile the two (Paul's never really been my favorite anyway).
And then to not hear his voice, not feel his help and guidance, well it's just hard to beleive that forgiveness is there. And especially when i so need his help and strength today more than ever.

Ashby gave me a few more books to start on last night. I think i might start with Wuthering Heights first. I'm also still reading through the psalms, though pretty slowly. The new testament is still pretty hard to read right now.
Brad said something last night that i've been thinking about since. He said God is saying to us, "trust me".
I'm wondering if it can really be that simple.